The episode of Me VS the father who refuses to pay me the tuition fees have finally came to an end on last wed. It may not be the scene I imagined it to be, but it wasnt a bad outcome either.
Just for reference for anyone going to small claim tribunal in the future,
1. Make sure the name you filed is the actual name of the person and not any random angmoh name he/she give themselves. That was what happened to me and i couldnt file the claim initially. Luckily with some help I managed to get the name :)
2. Prepare all your 'so called' evidence and be well prepared, regardless if it is during the meeting with registrar or the actual hearing. It always make a good impression if you are well prepared and able to ans the question uhh
3. Do not be over confident. This was something I learnt along the way because i realise the people actually wont really like you if you are over confident cos it seems like you very 'ya ya' HAHA. Be firm but dont appear like you are goin to win it all.
4. There is always a outcome of settlement even up to the point of the hearing. I went to the court thinking today someone is going to give me my affirmation. Today, either someone of authority will tell me if i am right or i am wrong. Regardless of the outcome, its a closure, closure to my whole year of stress and upset-ness. Closure to all the woo-ha, all the sleepless night, all the nights thinking how on earth someone like this can be a father, thinking how scary is this world. But who knows? when i got there, the judge encouraged us to go for a settlement. Eventually I did get back my money but on a compromise of the 50 bucks I paid for filing the claim. The thing is, i didnt went there for pure sake of the money. I was hoping to get some ans, some understanding, some judgement, basically someone to tell me its okay its all over. I accepted the settlement because to be honest, its more practical. My heart tell me to reject, my mind tell me to accept. My mind tell me justice cant fill my stomach, the money can. (okay not to the extend but you get what i meant) But without the outcome i was hoping for, i was actually upset for 2 WHOLE DAY. (i was upset over my A'lvl results for erm 2 weeks so that was actually not so much now that i think about it horr hahah). Anw back to topic, during the settlement at the hearing, if you really cannot accept the terms, reject it. its okay. I actually rejected the first offer of a sum lesser because i rather be getting my judgment from the hearing. Do note that all these while the hearing has not started and will not start if you two have a settlement. Think carefully before you ans the judge and do not drag too long because the court dun have a whole day to wait for you. I actually think i could be in the judge's bad book because i took soooo long which is also one of the reason I decided to not go with the hearing :/
PS to the judge: I know you tried to convince me to move on with my life and put it all behind me. It was all out of goodwill and because of what you said, I finally understood the meaning of grey areas in life. No matter how many people tell me how right I am, no matter how much affirmation I get, I wouldnt be able to get on with my life unless i chose to do so. The scene i imagined was always how the law will tell me the father is wrong. How he tried to ask me to go for dinner with him making me damm freak out and scared of seeing him whenever i go for tuition, is wrong. How he refuse to pay me my tuition fee after my summer exchange is wrong. How he told his daughter that he paid but even the daughter dun dare bring this lie to me hence tell me she dunno, is wrong. How despite he refuse to pay still tried putting the blame on me, is wrong. But you are trying to tell me, even if i do get that ans on that day, the closure only comes within myself. Since that is the case why not just end this thing earlier and put it behind sooner. It really doesnt make a big diff if just one more person tell me i am right. I understand, how would i not understand this logic, but it was all a case of expectation vs reality.
To my family and friend, thanks for being so supportive of me throughout this whole journey. Despite doubting me going all the trouble for just this 200 over sum, you guys were super supportive from telling me to trash the guy, to telling me thats just how shameless some people are. I really appreciate it and tbh it may sounds cliche but i wouldnt have made it so far without your support.
Esp to dadi, thanks for being there no matter what. The past few month have been a roller coaster ride and so much things have happened. Not just this court case but many many stuff. Many many unhappiness. It was like a tunnel of dark but i know i will be able to walk out as long as you are holding my hand. (isit my angmoh good heh :P) thanks for being here, not just for the good times but for the bad too!❤ (Sounds like something i saw on someone's tumblr uhh) But really without you constantly reminding me that "Things will get better, it will be over" I think I would still be in that stupid tunnel :/
李代沫
谢谢你
作词：潇彬
作曲：文颖秋
曾听过 很多难听的话
幸运的是 我没被打垮
其实没有他们说的那么差
现实并不能让我趴下
我拥有一个温暖的家
它告诉我 爱有多强大
它让最黯淡的过往 开出了花
微笑是 面对人生最好的办法
谢谢你 那些命运给的惩罚
谢谢你 所有关心 不论真假
谢谢你 那些过得去 那些过不去的伤疤
它在提醒我 这是成长的代价
Just for reference for anyone going to small claim tribunal in the future,
1. Make sure the name you filed is the actual name of the person and not any random angmoh name he/she give themselves. That was what happened to me and i couldnt file the claim initially. Luckily with some help I managed to get the name :)
2. Prepare all your 'so called' evidence and be well prepared, regardless if it is during the meeting with registrar or the actual hearing. It always make a good impression if you are well prepared and able to ans the question uhh
3. Do not be over confident. This was something I learnt along the way because i realise the people actually wont really like you if you are over confident cos it seems like you very 'ya ya' HAHA. Be firm but dont appear like you are goin to win it all.
4. There is always a outcome of settlement even up to the point of the hearing. I went to the court thinking today someone is going to give me my affirmation. Today, either someone of authority will tell me if i am right or i am wrong. Regardless of the outcome, its a closure, closure to my whole year of stress and upset-ness. Closure to all the woo-ha, all the sleepless night, all the nights thinking how on earth someone like this can be a father, thinking how scary is this world. But who knows? when i got there, the judge encouraged us to go for a settlement. Eventually I did get back my money but on a compromise of the 50 bucks I paid for filing the claim. The thing is, i didnt went there for pure sake of the money. I was hoping to get some ans, some understanding, some judgement, basically someone to tell me its okay its all over. I accepted the settlement because to be honest, its more practical. My heart tell me to reject, my mind tell me to accept. My mind tell me justice cant fill my stomach, the money can. (okay not to the extend but you get what i meant) But without the outcome i was hoping for, i was actually upset for 2 WHOLE DAY. (i was upset over my A'lvl results for erm 2 weeks so that was actually not so much now that i think about it horr hahah). Anw back to topic, during the settlement at the hearing, if you really cannot accept the terms, reject it. its okay. I actually rejected the first offer of a sum lesser because i rather be getting my judgment from the hearing. Do note that all these while the hearing has not started and will not start if you two have a settlement. Think carefully before you ans the judge and do not drag too long because the court dun have a whole day to wait for you. I actually think i could be in the judge's bad book because i took soooo long which is also one of the reason I decided to not go with the hearing :/
PS to the judge: I know you tried to convince me to move on with my life and put it all behind me. It was all out of goodwill and because of what you said, I finally understood the meaning of grey areas in life. No matter how many people tell me how right I am, no matter how much affirmation I get, I wouldnt be able to get on with my life unless i chose to do so. The scene i imagined was always how the law will tell me the father is wrong. How he tried to ask me to go for dinner with him making me damm freak out and scared of seeing him whenever i go for tuition, is wrong. How he refuse to pay me my tuition fee after my summer exchange is wrong. How he told his daughter that he paid but even the daughter dun dare bring this lie to me hence tell me she dunno, is wrong. How despite he refuse to pay still tried putting the blame on me, is wrong. But you are trying to tell me, even if i do get that ans on that day, the closure only comes within myself. Since that is the case why not just end this thing earlier and put it behind sooner. It really doesnt make a big diff if just one more person tell me i am right. I understand, how would i not understand this logic, but it was all a case of expectation vs reality.
To my family and friend, thanks for being so supportive of me throughout this whole journey. Despite doubting me going all the trouble for just this 200 over sum, you guys were super supportive from telling me to trash the guy, to telling me thats just how shameless some people are. I really appreciate it and tbh it may sounds cliche but i wouldnt have made it so far without your support.
Esp to dadi, thanks for being there no matter what. The past few month have been a roller coaster ride and so much things have happened. Not just this court case but many many stuff. Many many unhappiness. It was like a tunnel of dark but i know i will be able to walk out as long as you are holding my hand. (isit my angmoh good heh :P) thanks for being here, not just for the good times but for the bad too!❤ (Sounds like something i saw on someone's tumblr uhh) But really without you constantly reminding me that "Things will get better, it will be over" I think I would still be in that stupid tunnel :/
李代沫
作词：潇彬
作曲：文颖秋
曾听过 很多难听的话
幸运的是 我没被打垮
其实没有他们说的那么差
现实并不能让我趴下
我拥有一个温暖的家
它告诉我 爱有多强大
它让最黯淡的过往 开出了花
微笑是 面对人生最好的办法
谢谢你 那些命运给的惩罚
谢谢你 所有关心 不论真假
谢谢你 那些过得去 那些过不去的伤疤
它在提醒我 这是成长的代价
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